Anniv Thoughts

I am glad that I am free to blog this time. I am not going to work this Friday to have enough time to celebrate our 8th year anniversary.  I want to jump yipeee!!! Actually, this is the first time that we are going to celebrate it with me not going to work.  I just realize that I still have many vacation leaves left and in a few months I’ll be having a new set of leaves and I still have 9 or 10 leaves to consume until the year ends. 

I am really glad that my boss approved my leave and only teased me when I said that the reason I filed for a vacation leave is that– it is my anniv date. I just feel so proud that it is not just an anniv date. It is our 8th years together. I just can’t imagine ang bilis talaga ng panahon. 

As they’ve said the seventh year is a very crucial stage. I agree.  Actually, it was the fifth that is more crucial. In that year, we almost broke up. Because we’ve already passed that stage, the seventh year is another challenge and what is harder is that in my part, my problem during the fifth year resurfaces again this seventh year.   Because I began questioning myself. Could I accept the fact that our problem will always resurface and it couldn’t be undone anymore? 

I began to have fears of what if he is not the one. My sister breaking up with her ex is very sad because all the while our family thought they will end up together forever.  Though we still don’t know what the future will bring,  I was just saddened because their story is like those stories where lovers are really destined for each other. No matter what they do, they end up meeting each other then, they fall in love. But what happened to them, they just end up as friends. Though you are right, at least, they are still friends.

Though my boyfriend always assures me that we are meant for each other, I always tell him that we should just pray that that is the will of God.  Because I assure him that if I am not the one, I am happy that there is someone out there that could love him more than me.  All I want is for him is to be happy with or without me.  He don’t like hearing those words because he tells me we will be together forever *period*. But I always insist in Him that it is up to God. 

But I am really glad that whatever will happen in the future, I am glad that at present we have each other for our 8th anniversary. 

I hope I can give the same amount of love he gives me. I just don’t like the feeling that my boyfriend loves me more than I love him.  Gusto ko equal lang kami kasi siyempre parang ndi naman tama yun dapat patas lang. Should I wish for that?